Nothing much really.

I have lacked energy lately, partly from having a head cold and partly because I am not at my best in the depths of winter. To be frank, I would rather be in my pyjamas drinking hot chocolate and reading, than going to work, being a taxi to school teen, making dinners, washing clothes and keeping the menagerie (human and non-human) happy.

I want a cave to escape into..

Apart from that, at the moment (and usually couple of times a year), I get a feeling that something momentous is going to happen. I recognise the signs these days, but in previous years the feeling was disconcerting to say the least. I get a hankering for nostalgia, I start thinking what ifs and I get generally fairly discontented with my life. This is not a great place to be. One of the states I strive for is contentment and on the whole I am fairly successful. I am grateful for the comfortable circumstances in which I find myself, I am healthy and really I should not complain about anything.

So where does this anxiety come from? When these feeling of change happen, I get a bit jittery, and bad-tempered, I long for younger years and different choices, it is a real “Sliding Doors” feeling, I fantasise and I wonder what the me in a parallel universe is doing right now.

MV5BMTI0NjExNDg2N15BMl5BanBnXkFtZTYwMDMyOTA5._V1_SY317_CR4,0,214,317_AL_ Is she healthy? Did she pursue her ambition to specialise in Oncology and live in Melbourne?? Is she married, does she have children???

It’s all a bit silly I know and this little episode has been kicked into gear by watching a doco on Joy Division,


… ah I miss the days of clubbing 3 nights a week and having the energy to keep going all night and still go to work in the morning!



6 thoughts on “Wassup?

  1. This post made me smile – these days if I have to go out twice at the weekend, I feel exhausted, and you’re right, we all used to go out several times a week and skip sleep when necessary. Ah youth, it truly is wasted on the young!

    • My BFF is a classic extrovert and we complement each other, (she says I am Samantha and she is the evil cousin-remember her?). She acknowledges my need to shut away, but every now and then cajoles me out of my comfort zone and we have a bit of fun. She needs people and noise, I need solitude and quiet. I get exhausted just reading her facebook page!

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